Elmo and the fishes

We are taking a break from Elmo at our house. I like Sesame Street. What’s not to like about the old songs such as “Who are the people in your neighborhood?” and “Captain Vegetable.” I like Super Grover, Bert and Ernie, and The Count. My girls like Elmo. Even before they turned two, one of them would occasionally pick up the “mope” (AKA remote), point it at the TV, and start saying, “Elmo. Elmo.”

Thanks to the miracle of TiVo, we can, in fact, watch Sesame Street whenever we want to. So we’ve been watching Sesame Street, usually not more than once a day, usually while I make dinner. It keeps the girls happy while I try to get something done. However, they don’t really want to watch Sesame Street. They want to watch the last twenty minutes of Sesame Street: Elmo’s World. And when Elmo goes off the screen, replaced by Mr. Noodle or whoever else, they start chanting “Elmo, Elmo,” until he comes back.

How did the Elmo-love begin?

I blame the diapers. I have no idea why, but we used only Huggies diapers for a long time. But then one day I bought Pampers, and naturally, I tried to make the diaper-changing experience as fun as possible by pointing out which character was on the next diaper. “Oooh. Big Bird. Big Bird is on your diaper this time. ”

Before long, Emily and Erica were making requests. They wanted the Elmo diapers all the time. But after a while they started asking for Zoe and Ernie. Joel and I got pretty good at sneaking on the unrequested Grover and Big Bird diapers. But then the girls started to check. So now I’ve gotten pretty good at convincing them to wear whatever diaper I grab first, but it can be a tough sell.

So, we need a break from Elmo. He talks in third person all the time. “Elmo wants to sing a song. Can you sing a song with Elmo? Elmo wants to ride in a fire truck. Elmo wants to use the potty.” How are our kids going to learn to speak correctly if they are listening to this everyday?

And then there was the episode about fish. Elmo counted fish like this. . . “one fish, two fishes, three fishes, four fishes, five fishes. . . eleven fishes.” Then he sang “The Fishes Song.” Am I missing something here? Did someone go change the rules, and forget to tell us? Didn’t we all grow up reading “One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish?” What’s going on here, people??!!!

So, we are taking a break from Elmo.